Supporting Your Child Through the Basketball Tryout Process
Basketball tryouts can be stressful for players, parents, and coaches alike. Having experienced this process as a parent, a player, and a coach, I understand just how challenging it can feel from every angle. Selection time is testing for everyone involved, which is why the messages you share with your child during this period are so important.
1. Understanding the Process
As a parent, it’s natural to feel the pressure when your child is striving to be selected for their preferred team. The reality is that selection outcomes are subjective and depend on the opinions of coaches and selectors. Sometimes they’ll get it right, sometimes they won’t but it is always based on their perspective at that moment in time.
It’s important to remember:
Selection does not determine your child’s ultimate pathway. Many great players have been overlooked in the short term and later gone on to succeed at the highest levels including the NBA.
The process is out of your child’s control. What matters most is how they respond and grow from the experience.
2. The Role of Parents
Your words and actions during this period will have a lasting impact. If your child doesn’t make the team they hoped for, avoid blaming coaches, clubs, or the system. Life naturally comes with obstacles, and how your child learns to handle setbacks can define their resilience.
Your role is to:
- Provide encouragement without adding extra pressure.
- Help them keep perspective: this is one step, not the whole journey.
- Reinforcing that disappointment can fuel motivation and growth.
- Remind them that the selection process does not determine their future in basketball. Many players who were not selected have gone on to achieve incredible things in the sport.
3. My Personal Experience
Even at the highest levels, setbacks happen. I was one of the final players cut from the Junior World Championship team held in my home state (Melbourne). At the time, it was devastating. But I had a choice to quit, or use it to push myself harder. I chose the latter, and it became a turning point in my career.
I’ve seen the same with my own children. When they haven’t made a team they wanted to, I’ve explained to them that they too have a choice: they can give up, or they can use it as motivation to work harder and prove people wrong. We all have choices there is no right or wrong one. It’s about what you decide to do and how you use that setback as fuel to keep moving forward.
4. Tangible Goals for Players at Tryouts
Encourage your child to set controllable goals they can focus on during trials. Here are three key areas:
Be Vocal and Visible
- In trials with 40–60 players (sometimes more), coaches notice the kids who talk.
- Encourage your child to communicate loudly on defence, give high-fives, and support teammates.
- Energy, positivity, and leadership stand out more than silence.
Keep the Game Simple
- If they have a shot, take it. If they have a drive, go for it.
- Keep decisions simple—do not complicate things.
- There’s a saying: “One-on-one, have some fun. One-on-two, not for you—find a teammate.”
- Trials often show kids trying too hard, forcing plays, and it usually backfires. Coaches look for players who make good, unselfish decisions.
Defend, Rebound, and Compete
- Stay in front of their player defensively.
- Rebound hard and run the floor.
- These effort areas are controllable and always noticed.
If you look closely, these goals aren’t about scoring, they are about focus, concentration, and enthusiasm. Making every shot is unrealistic because you can’t control that, and players and parents should not judge their tryout performance on whether the ball went in.
Prepare your child to understand that:
Trials are not perfect. Mistakes will happen. Shots will be missed.
What matters most is how they respond: do they maintain focus, keep their energy high, and stick to their processes?
The players who can overcome errors and keep playing with good body language and confidence are the ones who stand out.
5. Final Thought
Encourage your child by letting them know that regardless of the result, you are extremely proud of them. If they give everything they’ve got and leave it all on the floor, then they’ve succeeded because they’ve given it their best shot.
“Try outs don’t define your child – their resilience, attitude, and choices do.”
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About Matt Shanahan
I grew up in the Victorian basketball system, starting as a junior representative player and working my way up to the state level. My journey led me to an AIS scholarship and the opportunity to represent Australia in the Under-19 World Championships, where we won a silver medal.
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Head Coach - back-to-back Under 18s National Champions
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